Not For Girls Only

 As a mom of all boys, I feel it is all the more my responsibility to teach them about girls and how to treat them well, since they don’t have any sisters around to practice proper treatment on! But there are times when I feel I have advice to share with girls (mostly what NOT to do) from my past experiences and things I’ve learned over the years.

In past years I have helped teach the teen girls at our church, but I am now involved in teaching the very little ones in our nursery school class, so miss out on the teen girls.

The other day I was talking with a few of those teen girls and we decided that a Girls Lunch would be nice. So today, I picked them up and we had a nice lunch and a wonderful conversation. They are all delightful young ladies and I enjoyed my time with them VERY much.

I look forward to trying to get together again a couple more times this summer before they all go their different directions for school.

Here is what I had prepared for them. I don’t know who wrote the apple tree poem. Wish I did – I would give the proper credit. But it is very good – whoever you are! The eleven other items are just my own observations.

And believe me… I go over this stuff with my boys too.

Anyway, just thought I’d share.



Girls are like
on trees. The best
ones are at the top of the tree.
The b
oys don’t want to reach for
the g
ood ones because they are afraid
of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
just get the r
otten apples from the ground
at aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples
at the t
op think something is wrong with
them, when in reality, they’re amazing.
They just have t
o wait for the right
oy to come along, the one
o‘s brave enough
to climb
all the way
to the top
of the tree.  

1.   When it comes to guys, listen to your Dad. He knows what he’s talking about. Trust him if he say’s “he’s no good for you.” Or “I don’t trust that guy”. He’s a guy, and he’s been a young man before… he knows something you don’t! (How they think!)

2.   If something seems wrong about a situation – it is! Listen to your gut! God gave you instincts, believe in them.

3.   NEVER, ever, ever, ever, stay in a situation where you feel uncomfortable or scared. It is NOT worth it. Get out. Don’t worry about his feelings! He will get over it faster than you think! And if he really does care about you – he will want you to feel safe, protected and comfortable – all the time.

4.   If the guy is willing to put you in a situation that might tarnish your reputation… he is NOT , I repeat NOT, the guy for you.

5.   Girls have a better brake system that boys do. Just keep that in mind.

6.   Let God lead you to your mate! He has a good one picked out for you. Don’t overlook him just because you think he is too good for you, or you don’t deserve him. God works out ALL things for those who love him!

7.   Being alone (and thinking you are going to die a sad & lonely person – which is NOT true) is far better than being with the WRONG person. Just ask someone in an abusive relationship.

8.   Watch how this guy interacts and treats his mother. Truly, he will treat you the same way – eventually.

9.   Note how a guy deals with stressful situations. What is he like with: traffic, tangled Christmas lights, waiting in lines, loud little kids, small animals, etc…? Just say’en… it’s an indicator.

10. Make sure he is a best friend. Some guys are great fun on a date, but during the mundane times, he is not enjoyable to be with at all. Make sure you can enjoy his company ALL the time, not just when you’re out having fun. (of course I know there will be disagreements and such – but in general – just know him well before you make any kind of commitment!)

11. Remember that God can MAKE INTO GOOD, any bad decisions we make. Not to say we don’t have to pay the consequences, but just know that HE walks with you through everything, if you let HIM.                               


                                                                 Love, Miss Heidi


I just pray that my boys become the brave young men that will climb to the top of the apple tree!

There is a bunch more in my “girl” notes, (just in case I had a girl) but I didn’t want to hand these girls a book of my “advice” and scare them off or bore them to death! (I also have a “book” of grandma notes! One day…!)





Filed under Something Special, Thoughtful Reflection

2 responses to “Not For Girls Only

  1. Papa

    Beautifully put!!!
    I’m so proud of you as a daughter, mother, spouse
    to Dave and most of all, as my best friend.
    Love you,

  2. Amy

    Awesome post, lady! I hope many many young ladies read it!

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